GO CRAZY FOLKS GO CRAZY

*** That was Jack Buck's call & that is what has happened in the world of sports. All kind of whack-o news ;
1. The Tiger Tales
2. Urban - Leaving or Staying
3. Mike Leach - Lubbock Lunatic or Leader
4. Fat Mark - Kansas hero to Kanned
5. Caldwell craps out

Just think , at the first of the month none of this was known. When the Sports World turns it moves in strange ways.

As great a golfer as Tiger is, he is just as big a Screw - up. 14 cars in the HO -Train at last count . Wife ,Family, Good Guy Rep all gone.

Is Urban Liar the Boss of Gator Nation ? Will he or won't he ? I hear he is buying a chain of Waffle Houses.

Mean Mike Leach made poor Adam James stand in a dark room . Then Mean Mike referred to the players sweeties as their fat little girlfriends. Mercy Mercy how cruel can you be ?

Come on , this is a guy who looks like a fat Vince Gill. Mike needs to stop reading about Pirates. Next thing they will have a plank at practice. All Right Adam You're first up.

War , Famine ' & Heartbreak these Tech guys are ready

Big Mark goes from National Coach of the Year in 2007 to fired for abuse in 2009. Mangino also blows apart the Jolly Fat Man Theory. I guess if you we weigh 465 the stress of finding britches you can wear would make one testy. You can't be mean to the children . After all most of these boys have less than 3 felony arrests

Jimmy Caldwell ,if the Colts win the Super Bowl they will always wonder could we have been perfect . If the Colts don't go all the way this is your burden for life bro.

It is hard to take it easy for a month & keep your edge. You are in a no win situation Jimmy . You should have given the players a shot at perfection.

DECISIONS,DECISIONS,DECISIONS

**** Urban Meyer make up your mind.

You can be the coach or not be the coach . You can not be both . The substitute coach concept will not work. Check Arizona & Duke for confirmation.

The program has to know who is the man. Who has the final say. Who hires the new DC ? A recruit wants to know if you are going to be there or not.

You can not run a football team & take six months off . It is a 24/7 365 job. Urban ; You can't have one foot in the boat & one foot on the bank.

You wind up in the water every time !

**** JIMMY ;YOU LOST THE GAME & YOU TEAM ALSO

Jim Caldwell & the Colts office made a poor decision . They went against players & fans wishes in not going for 16 - 0.

Resting players has not worked for the Colts in the past. I think the Colts are 1-7 in their first playoff game . The only time the Colts did not rest players they won the Super Bowl.

Looking at the faces on the Colt sideline this move better work .

I am afraid Jimmy may have thrown away the MOJO .

THE BEST CHRISTMAS PRESENT

**** Chilli Pepper & I received the greatest Christmas gift of all. We have our first grandchild. A Christmas Day baby named Abigail Elizabeth Graves . She is called Abby Beth.

**** Abby Beth arrived at 10:09 pm on December 25,2009. Born on the day we celebrate our Lord's birthday is a wonderful event. I hope & pray the Lord Jesus will always have his hand on Abby Beth in a special way.

**** I pray for Rhett & Amy to be great parents for their little girl & that the Lord blesses them all of their days. Praise Jesus for their healthy baby & the love they share.


**** The River of Life is an awesome thing . As I look at Abby Beth I wonder what my grandparents would be thinking. I would guess not many people get to see their grandchildren 's grandchildren. I know Jimmy & Edith Mae and Jim & Faye would be so thrilled.

**** I guess We will need a rescue squad to get Chilli Pepper out of the clouds . This girl & her grandmaw are going to be a sight.
Rhett said Abby Beth loves to eat & sleep . Papa Rock told Rhett that was just genetics .


***** THANK YOU JESUS FOR THIS WONDERFUL GIFT !!!!

JINGLE BELLS & ALL THAT

* I am not a big Christmas guy. I don't really know why but I'm just not.

It seems to me that we have everything backwards . We have made a time for giving into a time for getting . A time for peace into a time of stress.

There is a lot of stress over money at Christmas. We worry if we have enough to buy everyone what all they want. I am told some folks spend the entire year paying off Christmas bills.

There is a lot of time pressure at Christmas . All those deadlines to finish shopping. All those crowds to battle, parking a is demolition derby ,& fighting other shoppers for the items you want.

There is a hugh amount of stress to be every where you need to be. Families live farther away than in the past . Hard to be at Moms one day then the IN-Laws 200 miles away the next . It is hard for all the kids to make it home at the same time. Hard for Grandpaw & Grandmaw to visit all the kids when they live in different states.

We haved turned a season of peace & joy into a big commerical stress test. Most people only enjoy Christmas being over.

Why should we be concerned about getting when we already have the greatest Christmas gift . JESUS ! Just the Joy of our Savior should be the only Christmas gift we need or want .

What if this Christmas we reflected on the gift of Jesus ? Could we give to the hungry & homeless ? Could we give care & love to those who have none ?

Kahil Gilbran said " When We give of possessions We give little. When We give of ourselves do we truely give "

Why do We give meaningless gifts that are forgotten as soon as they are unwrapped ? Let us spend this Christmas season reflecting on Jesus & the wonderful gift we have . And give of ourselves rather than possessions.


MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM THE MEDINA MYSTIC

RAMBLING AROUND

* Told you the Feds would not get Sick Willie. Why ? Too many crooks in Memphis. They would have to lock up the whole bunch.

Lot had more luck looking for a good man in Sodom. Harder to find a good man in Memphis.

* Tiger Fans need to get over John Calipari . Cal is gone . Let it go. You knew what you were getting when Cal came to town . He did exactly what he said .

You enjoyed the ride so now don't start crying when it is time to pay the bill. Remember the good times & start a new dance with Josh.

You can't move on to tomorrow when you hold on to yesterday.

* I don't think I have seen a better QB than Peyton Manning. If my life depended on a game Peyton is the QB I would choose. Manning is the best ever at reading defenses.

* When Pat Summitt was at UT - Martin her name was Pat Head . Her nickname was Bone as in Bonehead. I wonder if anyone ever calls her that anymore.

If Gino knew this I bet he would . Gino is disliked by most women's coaches because of his smart remarks. Just mention Gino & you can see Bone's blood pressure spike.

I think Gino is funny . The Hot Tub remark was` cute & then he said Bone looked good for an older lady . Bone was not laughing.

Bone just needs to kick Gino's butt a couple of times & he will shut up. Gino hates to lose & Bone should kick him where it hurts. Of course it would help if Bone could win the games also.

THEN & NOW

* I used to love high school basketball. I am talking 30 to 50 years ago. The games at Medina or Milan were great.

I can not remember if it cost 50 or 75 cents for admission. Makes no difference I did not pay anyway. I hung around so much they thought I was part of the show.

All I know is for a quarter I could get a sack full of popcorn & a bottle coke. I would park my little butt on the baseline & watch the action.

What action there was ! Cheerleaders who twirled around & showed their drawers, mighty racy in 1960. If today's Pom -Pom teams had preformed then there would not be enough medics to treat the heart attack & shock victims . Whole communities would suffer from PTSD.

Many of the adults wore a tie to the games but that didn't prevent them from being a part of some great brawls. The Medina - Milan fight in 62 was the best. They had to call the Highway Patrol to break it up. The Baptist preacher displayed a couple of Ju-jit-su moves he must have learned at Union.

The teams played a pretty style of basketball with great outside shooters & solid post play . There were a few teams who used man to man defense like the Dyer Eagles but most played a great zone defense. The Milan Bulldogs were known far & wide for their 1-2-2 match-up zone. Looking back I am not sure Medina played any defense. The Hornets looked to out score you which they seldom did.

OH & the Girls games were a bigger deal than the Boys . They played the old 3 on3 half court rules. It was hard to do much on defense with just 3 players so it was common to see players who averaged 30 PPG.

I do not enjoy the games much anymore. I can not stand the tempo & the style. These teams play like crackheads whose clothes are on fire.

Their thinking is if you foul every play the refs can't call all the fouls. I have wacthed Roller Derby with much less contact than basketball .

I bet you can not name 5 good post -up players. These guys don't take time for the post to position.

No one plays the clock . Just get out there & go like hell till the buzzer blows. Sounds like a battle plan not a game plan .

Zone defense gives you a chance to win when the other team is more athletic. Coaches will not play zone . Why ? Two of my final teams played zone because we were so slow . Those teams finished 50 & 6 . Can't win playing zone ? Bullsnot !

I am tired & my meds are wearing off .More on this later.

THIS & THAT

* Well, I told you about the Heisman Trophy . Ingram is not the best player in the SEC much less the nation.

If you are the media's Chosen One then you got it locked up. The Heisman is a bogus award which seldom goes to the best player in the country.

* Why can't the Cowboys win in December ? The Boys blew their playoff spot losing to the Chargers 20 - 17 yesterday.

The Cowboys are just an average team with big trouble in the owners box. Jerry just can't help meddling . JJ ,it hasn't worked in 14 years, & five coaches . Let it go !

* NO undefeated teams since the long ago Dolphins . Then New England goes all the way to the Super Bowl before the Giants popped them in the coconuts.

Now two teams ,the Colts & the Saints are unbeaten this late. Could we have a Super Bowl with two undefeated teams ? I don't think it will happen . But who knows ?

* Remember those 12 locks I gave you at the start of the NFL season . Well 8 of the 12 are winners & 3 are losers with the jury still out on one . I would settle for 2 out of 3 but 3 of 4 would be better.

* Congratulations to Devin Rutherford & the White Station Spartans for winning the TSSAA state championship. A few years ago the Spartans were winless now they are Champs.

TROUBLE IN TENNESSEE & TIGERLAND

* It looks like Tiger did not focus as much as we thought. His putter was not the only club he was swinging.

All those women lining up to say they were Tiger's reminds one of the WWE's HO TRAIN. Tiger didn't spend all his time at the practice range.

Some said Woods would never play again due to shame . Do not be stupid.

Of course Tiger will play again . Where else would he pick up checks & chicks ?

You have seen the world's greatest marketing program crash & burn . The losses will be measured in billions.

All those products will not be so eager to have Tiger push their Stuff. Of course Tiger could do the sex enhancing products. Use BangX & drive like a Tiger.

Here is the bottom line : It is dangerous to hold someone up as a hero because they can throw,hit,catch,kick or carry a ball.

* Lane Kiffin is reading my book. "How To Turn Your Program Around"

I said you could turn any program around with a 3 - Phase recruiting plan . The parts were Dope - Cars - Women. Insane Lane has been paying attention.

What do you think the Orange Pride group is all about ? College women who travel to high school games & hold signs saying "Come to Tennessee".

What do you think happens when you get to Tennessee ? If the game is played the way it used to be, the chick acts like she has never seen you before.

What are you going to do ? Transfer ? "These girls up here didn't do what they said they would" is not an NCAA reason for transfer.

If You get a Player there he is yours. Whatever it takes to get the little buckaroos is fair.

IT is not hard to see how corrupt college sports are when you realize it is all based on a LIE.

PEPPERS & ONIONS

* Hello everybody , I been out a while playing the hospital game . Oh the stories I could tell.

Germantown Methodist is just great. I could not have been taken better care of. Many Thanks to the wonderful nurses who helped me.

* Colt McCoy almost became a member of the Les Miles time management team. I am not sure Colt beat the clock but the BCS boys were not going to let Texas lose. Just ask Bo Pellini !

* I have placed no value on the Heisman Trophy since they cheated Peyton Manning in 1997. ESPN is owned by ABC . The other players bowl game was on ABC so ESPN became a non -stop commerical for the other guy.

Look for another screw -job this year. The Heisman is not supposed to be a team award but an individual honor. That lets out Ingram at Alabama. Ingram is not the best player on his own team.

The Stanford running back & the Nebraska defensive guy are outstanding players but I don't think they will get a sniff.

* What about the National Favorite ? There is no National Champion. This year is a great example. 5 of the 120 big division teams finished undefeated. SO we pick the two we like the best & declare the championship.

So sad Too bad for the other 3 undefeated teams . There will be no true Champion until there is a playoff. In my system the BCS conference champs plus two wild cards make up the field.

This year would be

Orgeon vs Georgia Tech

Cincinnati vs Texas

Boise vs Alabama

Ohio State vs TCU

Gators & Hawkeyes stay home , should have won your conference

BOBBY , TIGER , & CHARLIE

* Florida State pushed Bobby Bowden out the door . He did not want to go. Old Bobby wanted one more year.

Bobby was the coach at FSU for 34 years. His record was 315 - 97 - 4. But 42 of the losses came in the last nine seasons.

Bowden was 90 - 36 - 3 in his first 11 seasons leading the Seminoles.

Then FSU ripped off the most amazing 14 year run in college football history. The Seminoles were 152 - 19 - 1 winning double digits every year & two national championships .

What if Bowden had retired after the 2000 season ? He would have been 71 years old & hailed as the greatest college football coach ever.

Instead Bobby stayed too long & was tossed out like a broken chair. It was a sad end to a wonderful career.

* What is all the confusion over Tiger ? His wife whipped his butt simple as that.

No shame in that . Happens to most of us from time to time. Chilli Pepper has unloaded a can of Whoop on me before.

What happened ? Tiger & Elin were having an intense discussion when Elin lit into Tiger like a bobcat.

Getting clawed & scracthed Tiger chose to make a run for it. He jumped in the SUV & headed for the hills.

Elin in hot pursuit took a 3 - iron & smashed out the window behind Tiger's noggin. Tiger said what the .

Being distracted by smashing glass in his ear Tiger hit the tree. What is so hard to understand ?

* Norte Dame fired Fat Charlie. Now the Domers have to find a new coach. They will be surprised how hard it will be.

ND is not a good job anymore. 3 reasons
a. academics - too hard
b. climate - too cold
c. women - few hotties - many notties

If I am a great player why would I go somehere I have to study my butt off when I can just roll with the flow elsewhere.

I do not want to risk my coconuts when I could be on the beach admiring the view.

I want the girls to look like Erin Andrews & Layla Kiffin not Russian weightlifters.

The Irish need to find some of those student - athletes & forget the Players!!

WHAT A FOOTBALL WEEKEND

* We learned the SEC - East is superior to the ACC . Florida, Georgia, & Carolina all kicked butt on in- state rivals . Two of the teams getting kicked in the britches will be in the ACC championship. That looks bad on the conference.

* Mississippi State knocked the snot out of Ole Miss . The Dawgs finish 5 - 7 which is two games better than I expected. The four teams who beat State at Starkville finished 44 - 4. Good start for Big Dan !

* Ole Miss clocked in with an 8 - 4 record in a year more remembered for what they didn' t do than what they did.

The Rebels did not:
a. win the national championship
b. win the SEC championship
c. win the SEC - West
d. win the state of Mississippi championship
e. win the Heisman for Sneed

Other than that it was a great year for Ole Miss. Wonder how much preseason talking the Oxford bunch will do next year ?

I say a lot because big - talking is in their DNA.

* Tennessee rolls in at 7 - 5. That is a good year for the Big Orange.
The Vols improved a lot during the season . In a brief moment of insanity I wished Crompton had another year.

Praise the Lord that moment of madness passed. Looking back at the Crompton era is like a train wreck you survived. You don't know how you made it.

* You think the Liberty Bowl people are glad LSU beat Arkansas . The Liberty wants the Hogs Big - time to meet Houston . Two great Quarterbacks & lots of points will sell tickets plus great TV ratings. If the Hogs had beat LSU they might have gone to a bigger bowl.

* The White Station Spartans are in the TSSAA Football Championship game. Would you have believed it ? I remember when the most excitement at a Spartan game was a Streaker.

I was there at Houston when it happened. He came off the WSHS sideline ran down the center of the field wearing a ski mask & tennis shoes.

He was about out of gas after an 80 yard run & scaling the south end zone fence to escape. I feared he suffered a quality of life altering injury going over the sharp wire atop the fence .

Wonder if the Streaker would make a return apperance at the title game ?

A TRIP ALL AROUND HEALTH CARE LAND

* I am concerned about health care . This law will have a hugh impact on millions of Americans.

Why am I so worried ? I am one of the biggest consumers of health care in the country. Let me tell you a story about the last seven years.

I have had eight surgeries or procedures since October 2003. I have number nine coming up next week. The count stands as follows ;
2 heart surgeries
3 eye surgeries
2 kidney procedures
1 dental surgery

Oh yes two diabetic collapses that ended with a hospital visit . I am an expert on health care by virtue of experience .

This health care deal is a great example of how Jesus takes care of things.

For 30 years we used Chilli Pepper's insurance . Then we learned that the insurance could not be continued after her retirement.

To be eligible for my insurance you had to be in the program one year before retirement. So we signed up in July of 2003, thinking I might retire in 2004.

I had only two deductions taken from my check when the big one hit. We beat the deadline by a month.

Jesus sure took care of Chilli Pepper & me . I bet the insurance company wonders why Jesus did not give them a heads up about us.

The insurance has been wonderful & my health professionals are great. My medical team is Dr. Arie {heart}, Dr. Dale {sugar} , & Dr. Leslie {kidney} . So many others have taken such good care of me.

Germantown Methodist sends me preferred customer specials in the mail.

I do not know the answer to health care. I think every one should have good health care. I don't think a family should face financial
ruin due to illness.

How can we spend billions on a war & not take care of the sick ? How can society pay entertainers millions while there are hungry children ?

I wish you & I could be Jesus Activists. Where we really live what we say we believe.

LES MILES IS NO THUCYDIDES

* Thucydides said " I fear my own mistakes far more than any strategy of my enemy" In other words Don't beat yourself . Les has not learned this.

Miles did the worst job of clock management in the Ole Miss game that I have witnessed in over 50 years of watching football.

I will not repeat the chain of events here. Even if you saw it you can not comprehend what happened.

Miles makes more than 3 million a year to coach the Tigers. For that kind of cash you would think he could manage the clock.

If I were the LSU AD I would encourage Les to coach elsewhere. If someone would take Miles I would pay the freight to get him there. It was that bad.

This type of judgement you expect from a Daddy Coach in the 8 year old league . Not in the SEC.

The only case close to this happened at Medina in 1970. Medina Women's superstar Penny Ferguson missed almost the whole first half of her District tournament game.

Penny was sitting outside the gym in a 56 Hudson Hornet pitching WOO with the Mystic. Time flies when you are having fun.

When Penny hit the door there was 1:22 left in the half & the Lady Hornets were in a deep hole. Coach M.N. Underfall was some kind of hot. Coach was almost as upset as the LSU fans.

* IS THERE A CONSPIRACY AMONG THE ZEBRAS ?

For the record I don't think that there is a conspiracy among the SEC officials. The SEC is sending nine or more teams to bowls. The conference gets the same money no matter who goes where.

The danger of a team being protected happens in a non BCS conference where that team is the only hope for a big money Bowl.If the team does not make it the conference gets no money.

There might be some unspoken pressure from the conference office to see that the Hope makes the Big Dollar game.

* HAVE A HAPPY THANKSGIVING

THE SAW

* In the Agri - Lab at MIT { the Ag - Shop at Medina } there was a hugh table saw. The saw had a short in the system & would shock the mess out of you when you touched it.

We discovered that if we held hands the shock would pass through every body but the guy on the end of the line. A great new game was created.

We made a human chain from the saw to the door of the shop. When some one came through the door you would grab him & turn on the saw. The jolt would set the Dude dancing. You could almost hear Jerry Lee singing "Whole lotta shaking going on ".

One day my man J - Mac was the saw man & in the grab & hold position was the Mystic his bad self. We saw Floyd Bevell coming . We didn't much like Floyd so we figured we would light him up.

The door opened, I grabbed , J- Mac turned on the saw. You can't imagine my horror when I looked & it wasn't Floyd.

It was Wilton Wiles ,the AG teacher. Mr Wiles was bouncing on his right foot with his left arm & leg extended straight out. His hair was standing straight up despite the bottle of Vitalis he used.

I had two choices : Turn loose & take the Shock or Hold On. Being a follower of the teaching of Epicurus, to avoid pain & seek pleasure , I held on.

It seemed like forever before I could get them to turn off the saw. I bet it seemed like a long time to Mr Wiles also.

As soon as Mr Wiles could stand , he told us to line up & bend over. With a crazed look in his eyes & his hair still standing straight up, Mr Wiles proceeded down the line busting Butts with his paddle.

I don't know how many times Mr Wiles went up & down that line but he showed remarkable endurance for a fifty year old man.

I was sure it was a clear case of abuse . Where was Leslie Ballin when we needed him ?

We said we would never play the saw game again & we did not !

For at least two days !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DON'T BE BANGING ON BILLY BELLS

* Bill Belichick is one of the NFL's best coaches. He has 3 Super Bowl rings to back it up.

Belichick made the decision to go for fourth & two on his own 28 with a liitle over two minutes to play. The Pats were ahead 34 - 28. Bill said this was their best chance to win.

Truth is Belichick was scared of Peyton Manning. Bells knew Manning was going to score no matter where he got the ball. The only way to win was to deny Manning the ball.

Maybe Billy Bells was right ,that was the best chance for the win .

* What is this Mark Ingram for the Heisman talk ? The Bama back has had a good year but no better than Anthony Dixon at State.

Dixon posted his numbers with much less help than Ingram has at Alabama. How about Gebhard at Stanford ?

* How about those Cowboys ! They have a chance to take a two game lead in the division & they blow it . Give them the Monica Lewinski award.

The Cowboys need to stop trying to trick folks & play real football. Did you know the Boys defense has allowed the fewest points scored in the leauge ?

* I don't think there is a back in college football with more pop & sizzle than Dexter McCluster . He has every defensive coordinator in the SEC on Pepto ,Malox, & Exlax. You have to change drawers each time he touches the ball.

TO FRIENDS GONE ON
Life's evening sun is sinking low
A few more days & I must go
To meet the deeds that I have done
In the land beyond the setting sun

As I thunder toward life's finish line I've been reflecting some. The Lord sure blessed me !

Jesus allowed me to coach with & against some of the best of our time. Here is a salute to some who have gone on.

John Hooper - one of the smartest coaches of all time . Hooper dominated Tennessee high school football in the 60's . In 16 years Hooper lost only 28 games at Brownsville. Hooper was most professional in his methods, no cussing & ranting.

Jack Cain - another West Tennessee great. Cain won the State at Humboldt in 1978 but was best known for his Covington years. A cocky little Dude who always delivered.

Richard Ross - lead JCM in their glory years. A model of consistency winning big every year. Ross attended Grove high school in Paris after Hooper. Ross was always calm during the storm.

Richard Brock - Mr Baseball. Brock knew the rule book better than the guys who wrote it. He was an outstanding student of the game. Brock was precise in the way things were done. Aways tapping his pipe on his hand while making pitching changes or baiting the umps.

James Armstrong - old Humes quarterback , his coach was Rube Boyce , his center was Red West, & some kid named Elvis hung around practice . James marched to the beat of a different drummer . Armstrong won games with unusal means & methods James was a true North Memphis Guy. George Klein was a member of james ' group.

Leland Smith - Samurai Coach . Smith was a very intelligent man ,a delibrate decision- maker & a master of phyisical defensive football. I coached with Leland for 7 years in high school & college. We lost 12 times in our time together. We studied the teachings of Sun Tzu & pondered the mystery of life. Leland loved his players more than any other coach I have known. He was an Idealist & i still miss him.
,
There are so many more; Robert Randolph, Rube Boyce, Ollie Smith, Lionel Jones, Hosea Alexander, Johnny Johnson, Sonny Winters. The list goes on & on.

IT IS A LIE, JUST A GREAT BIG LIE !

I love college football. Lord help me I love it so. If you measure love by time my love for football is vast. I spend countless hours watching, reading about, or thinking about football.
I need to face the truth . I have been loving a lie. You see, college football is not a game. It is a business, a big business. The games are not played by university students but by hired guns. The coaches are not beloved educators but self -seeking CEOs. The fans are not on the up & up either. It is all a sham & fraud.
1. The Players - You think these guys are real students who just play the game to pass the time. How many of these students do you think would be in school if there was no football team ? Would you chose one of these to do your surgery ,plead your case, or run your business ? Most players are not students, just players training for the next level.
2. The Coach - More than half of D - 1 coaches make more than one million dollars a year. It is a sick society that places that high a value on a game . I forgot it is not a game it is big business. What does Coach put first ;Player welfare or his pay check ? Will Coach break or bend rules to keep the dollars coming ? Does a bear sit in the woods ? Will Coach break the contract & take off if he gets a better offer ? A Coach is a Mercenary ! No More No Less .
3. The Fans - The real fans are not at the games , they can not afford it. Have you seen the price of tickets ? Now they want a couple of thousand before you can buy tickets. You tell me Big Bubba in the team cap fixing flats can make the game. Tickets are held by Big Corporate & are given to customers, high rollers & sometimes company peons & serfs. Look at the median income of Memphis & tell me who is at the game.

All this is not what bothers me. It is the HYPOCRISY that kills me.
JUST CALL IT WHAT IT IS PLEASE !!!!!!

THE SLIDE

* They tell me that torture has been used at Guantanamo Bay & Abu Ghraib. They were doing water - boarding & things like that. I am just glad they did not use the most cruel torture of all : THE MEDINA SLIDE !!!!
* That slide at Medina School looked like it was 50 feet tall, to a fourth grader anyway .
* The SLIDE TORTURE worked like this ;
1. A couple of boys would run down the victim on the playground & take the poor soul to the bottom of the slide.
2. One would grab his wrists ,the other his ankles , & stretch him out at the bottom of the slide.
3. Then Reba McCoy ,the largest girl in the school would go into action. Reba was so big she could not fit in a desk ,she had to do her work at a table.
4. Reba brought a sheet of wax paper from home to increase her speed. Reba had enough velocity that her pig-tails stood straight out when she was coming down.
5. Then Reba dropped WHOP on the mid-section of the victim.
6. This was devastating .Few could make it back to class under their own power. Most had to be helped to the bus when school ended.
7. Jesse Tuggle wet his britches when Reba WHOPPED on him. I truely believe that Jesse smoked all that dope in high school for medical purposes in hope of recovery.

Even today when I look at that SLIDE I have a Post Traumatic Stress attack .

BREAKING NEWS -EXTRA EDITION

1. TOMMY SAYS GOOD-BYE
Tommy West spoke with more fire and passion ever at his final press conference. If old Tom had been that full of pee & vinager on the job he would still have a job.
Every thing Tommy said was true. But this is the real world . Talk about a level field & a short stick to fight with to the folks at ST.Jude. I am not sure there is a level field anywhere in the world. Life is not fair. IF it were I would be rich, handsome ,& able to tap dance. All you can do is make the best of the hand that you are dealt.
Do not feel bad for West .He made more money in 9 years than 99 % of the folks in Memphis make in a lifetime. Then to top it off gets almost 3 million to kiss off.
Feel bad for the Dude that got laid off at the factory. He has 3 kids ,a wife , a mortgage , & no income. Those are real problems. These Big - Timers don't live in the same world we do!

2. A.I. & THE L - TRAIN

Lionel Hollins is being stupid. Trying to prove he is the boss. Iverson has never paid attention to any coach & A.I. is not starting now.
The only way to have peace between the coach & Iverson is to make A.I. the player - coach. Course the team might never practice.
L - Train stop being a dork. You job is to get the most out of Iverson. Can he still play ? Who knows ? Put A.I. out there & let him ball till he falls. Allen can't stand embarrassment. If he can't play well you will not have to remove him . He will retire before he is laughed at.
All you smart radio boys, you get what you can from A.I. & then move on. Don't get in a silly power struggle over where he stars or not. Let Allen go all he can go.

ALL AROUND THE SEC - EAST

* FLORIDA - The Champs still look groggy to me . They sure are not having much fun. 9 - 0 with 3 to go . USC & FSU could be a little problem The Chickens will be a road trip. The Gators need to step it up!

* GEORGIA - Bulldog fans need to chill out . This is not their year. 5 - 4 with 3 to go, 2 at home . Georgia should be able to win at least one to be bowl bound. A toilet bowl.

* SOUTH CAROLINA - The Ol Ballcoach needs to go to the house . The team shows the signs of poor coaching such as clock management. Another late season collapse in progress. Good thing the Cocks already have 6 wins cause there may be none left.

* TENNESSEE - Better than expected . 5 - 4 with a chance to win remainder of games . Should get 2 of 3 . Great coaching job by the Kiffins.

* KENTUCKY & VANDY - Same-o same-o for these two.

SOME CHEAP SHOTS
* Could OLE MISS lose their last 3 ? Don't think so . Two are home games.. That trip to STATE could be a doozy.

* STATE needs 2 of 3 to go to a bowl . It will be tough to do . BAMA , Arkansas , & OLE MISS are the 3 with two in the Stark-patch. Big Dan has brought excitement to MSU ,I just wish he could bring Dixon back next year.

* The Medina Mystic has really enjoyed becoming a total recluse . Almost there . Last year the first in more than 50 years that I did not attend one basketball game. This year only two football games so far. Still trying to make sense of some things & find meaning in others. Life is so simple yet so complex. Are the answers blowing in the wind or could they be found in some smoke ?

JUST THINKING

* The Yankees won their 27th World Series . I was a baseball fan until age 15 . The Yanks won the pennant 13 of those years. The Bronx Bombers won the Series 8 times during that run. The Yankees winning was all we knew.
I became interested in other sports in 1965 & the Yanks stopped winning. As a fan I just drifted away & never came back. But I can still tell you the starting line-up & remember going to see the Yankees - White Sox in 1961.
Broke my heart when Maz hit that home run for the Pirates to win the 1960 World Series. They fired my hero Casey Stengal after the game.

* The World is much smaller now. Communications & Technology have brought things much closer. The Medina I grew up in does not exist anymore. I grew up pretty much in isolation. I was not much trouble because I didn't have many options. Things that happened far away were just that ; far away. Not like today ,where everything happens right outside your door.
Your behavior is determined a large part by your options. Parents ,that thought is a kick in the Coconut Grove.

* TSSAA has really messed up the play-offs. No one knows who is playing who including the Bozos at the TSSAA office.
People are not going to be interested in something they can't understand . TSSAA needs to have 3 public school classes & 2 private school classes. Knock the play-off bracket back to 3 games.
Too many champions & too many games have destroyed the system. We will never see these changes because TSSAA is all about the Dollars.

GIVE ME THE BEAT BOYS
AND FREE MY SOUL
LET ME GET LOST IN YOUR ROCK - N- ROLL
AND DRIFT AWAY

THE MYSTIC'S METAPHYSICAL MIND

* Cinderella's Best Chance - The best chance for a Cinderella team to win the mythical National Championship is in the BCS system ,not in a play-off. Why ? A Cinderella has a small chance to win a one-shot game for it all.
There is no way Cinderella can knock off 3 in a row. Just look at basketball. The last time the winner was not from a major conference was 1990. UNLV played the part of Cinderella with Tark as Godmother. Cinderella has left the building . Don't look for a return soon.

* Whose team is Mo playing on ? - Coaches & commentators speak of momentum like it is a force or a person. Momentum is a perception or a feeling .
Say the score at half is 21 - 14 . Who has momentum ? If the other team scored 14 at the start then your team rang up 21 you have MO going into the break. You put 21 on the board then the other guys popped back for 14 & head to the locker room feeling they have MO & can not be stopped .
The score is 21 - 14. Momentum is how you feel about it.
You are shootin 60% for the night but you have missed your last four . How do you feel about the next shot ? That is Momentum .

* Happiness is determined by expectation more than reality.
Ole Miss & Tennessee both have an 8 - 4 season in football. The Tennessee fans are as tickled as a man sitting on a feather duster. The Ole Miss fans are as happy as a Muslim at a pork chop dinner. Both teams are 8 - 4.
Why the difference ? The Rebs expected to win 10 or more & go to the SEC championship. The Vols were just looking to break even . Same record but different level of happiness.

LIKE THEY SAY IN MEDINA " IT'S NOT BAD IF YOU AIN'T USED TO MUCH !

JAB-JAB- CROSS-HOOK

* No National Champion
There will be no National Champion in D-1 college football this year . There has never been a National Champion in college football. It is the only sport without a play-off. The Championship is decided by voters,polls, & computers not on the field. We have a National Favorite not a Champion!
Could we have a play-off ? YES ! Will we have a play-off ? NO!
Why ? The powers that be do not want one. The reasons they give can be found all around the Bull-pen.
Here is a simple 8 -team play -off,
* the 6 BCS conference champions
* 2 At-Large teams
This 3 week play-off would add 2 games for Finalists & 1 game for semi-finalists. The play-off would be over by the New Year.
Plug in the conference champs with TCU & Boise at -large to see what this years play-off would look like.

* PICKING THE NFL
Picking NFL games is hard . You can't beat the spread. No Worry. Smart Guys pointed out the winning team covers the spread 86% of the time . So all you have to do is pick winners. I checked it out. In today's games the winner covered 10 out of 12. Only trouble I picked just 5 winners including 2 who didn't cover.

* GREAT LOOK
I loved Tennessee in black jerseys, orange pants,& their trademark helmets. Hope they wear them many times .

STRAIGHT TALK

* Will Brett destroy the Vikings ?
The Vikings made a great move in picking up Favre. A move that could mean a trip to the Super Bowl if Brett does what he is there for. Favre's job is to throw enough to keep the defense from loading up on the run. Give the ball to Peterson, throw just enough to keep the defense from ganging up.
Old # 4 threw over 50 times in the loss to Pittsburg. Brett ,You are not the focus of this offense . The running game is ! Peterson is the Sheriff You are the Deputy. Forget that & Forget Super Bowl.

*Are the Feds going to get Willie ?
I doubt it . Looks like they would have moved before now if they had the goods on the King. It would take Willie several years at Club Fed just to tell them how great he is.

* Want some money in your pocket ?
Here are a couple of almost sure things:
Packers will beat the Vikings. The Purple Gang is tired & battered, the Pack is rested & playing at home. Favre will not be able to resist the emotion & will try to win the game himself. Brett will forget about the running game & go all out gunslinger.
Hold on to your Drawers ! Georgia will cover vs the Gators . Georgia is coming in off a bye week while Florida is stumbling in. The Gator have needed help from the Zebras two weeks in a row. Superman is tired & a bit Whizzed . I am picking the DAWGS straight up!!

*MEDICAL ALERT FROM THE MEDINA MEDICINE MAN
Are you one of many who suffer from constipation ? Just can't find relief ? The Medina Medicine Man has help for you. Each day eat a double handful of peanuts . That should bring regular relief. You can sing along with Otis Redding "sitting on the dock on the bay"

THIS AND THAT

* Ken Hoover is running for the school board .
*Board Members Ernest Chism & Diane George attended Hoover's campaign rally
* Hoover is running against Board chairman David Pickler.
* It is unusual for board members to be involved in another district election other than their own.
* It would be hard for a body to work smoothly when they have tried to prevent each others election.
* This election is August 2010. Until then Chism & George must work with Chairman Pickler. It may be a tad tense in the meeting room.
* Is this an in-house rebellion ? Are the other Board members tired of Pickler's control ? Pickler has been a Board member & chairman for 12 years during which time he has greatly expanded the power of the chairman.
* This will be the first opposition Pickler has faced in 12 years . Pickler is the most high profile school board chairman ever. The Dude wears a letter jacket with chairman of the board embrioded across the front.
* The bottom line: Are the people tired of Pickler ? The question will be answered by the election.

MEMPHIS FOOTBALL

* Hero Tommy is taking his high wire act to a new level . This Dashing Devil has left no margin for error in his attempt to lead the Tigers to another toliet bowl. Millionair Tommy must win these last four for the Tigers to Roar.
* If Tommy decides to take the money and run, how about KIPPY BROWN for coach ?

MONDAY MORNING QUARTERBACKING

1. I was watching Florida & Mississippi State when struck by dejavu. The Florida offense ,I had seen it all before. 1972,-Marked Tree Arkansas,- Coach Charlie Stevens .
Coach Stevens coached the ninth grade team at Marked Tree for many years. Coach Stevens called his offense the Short Punt formation. Charlie had his fastest big guy 5 yards deep taking the snap with one to three blockers in front of him.
There you have it ; Tim Tebow almost 40 years ago. There is nothing new in football just things revisted.
Urb the Turd ; you didn't invent anything Old Charlie was there 40 years ago.

2.What a great job Insane Lane & Daddy Kiffin are doing. Lane has the offense playing as well as possible. The last two games Crompton looks like a real QB. Daddy- K is taking names & kicking butt with the Orange defenders.
Give the K- Gang a year or two to get players then look out SEC.

3. Dan Mullen needs a mental evaluation. He has the DAWGS playing exciting ball & staying close every game. But Big Dan has gone Ape- Doo on some play calls.
You do not throw jump passes with midgets, you don't run reverses on the goal line & you don't fake punts inside your thirty trailing by three.
Big Dan needs some RISK/REWARD training.

4. Are the Zebras taking care of top teams Bama & Florida ? It would cost the SEC big dollars for these two to fall from the top ranked spots. Just watching it seems close calls always go the Tide & Gators way.

FRIENDS, FOES, & HEROS

BOB KNIGHT
* best teacher of basketball ever
* self - destructed due to abusive behavior
* believed he could overcome lack of talent with his coaching

LOU HOLTZ
* top coach of the eighties
* master of turning around a program
* after five or six years had wore out his welcome
* magician who had multiple personalities

JOE GIBBS
* a fine man of character
* won 3 Super Bowls with 3 different Quarterbacks
* introduced the one-back offense to the NFL

AL MCQUIRE
* had understanding of game & players far different from others
* very complex person
* believed in great personel executing simple schemes
* collected tin soldiers and clowns
* rode motorcycle
* maybe the best ever game coach

BUM PHILLIPS
* his intelligence hidden by cowboy dress & folksy language
* creator of defensive numbering system used by most of football
* one of the first to use zone blocking in 1956
* one of the first to use 34 defense in the NFL
* could get the most out of his players

THINGS IN COMMON
* all have complex multiple personalities maybe even bi-polar
* all believed in simplicity & execution
* all knew that player talent trumped schemes
* all were able to get the maximum from their players


ANOTHER SUBJECT
I was not a real tough guy but I did get into more than my share of fights. To survive I became a master of the pre-emptive strike. That means when I felt threatened I sucker punched the dude
This brings us to ISRAEL / IRAN. To survive Israel must use the pre-emptive strike which they have done several times in the past.
Israel sees it as a choice between Strike or be Struck. Do or Die if you will. Israel knows the longer they wait the more danger Iran becomes. Look for a punch in a few months.

RANDOM SHOTS

Performance Enhancing Drugs
The Sports world is over-run with PED's. They are present on every level. It is very expensive & impossible to test for all PEDs. The drug makers stay one step ahead of the testing posse.
I thought a Free Market philosophy would control PEDs. Everyone knows the dangers of using PEDs so who would run the risk ?
I was wrong. I did not compute the proper Risk/Reward Ratio. In other words the Money is so much that players think it is worth the Risk.
Think about it . You are offered 50 million for 5 years . 10 million a year. So you take the PED to get the extra edge to seal the deal. Would you do it ? More are than not in the sports world.
What if the Rocket had said " I make 28 millon a year . I took that stuff to keep that gig. " Understood & Forgiven.
Where ever there are games there are PEDs . From Little Leauge to Major Leauge the Juice is flowing.
What can we do about it ? Not much. If someone is willing to take the risk it is impossible to stop them. It is their body , health , life & future. It is a simple decision. Is what I am going to get worth the price I am going to pay .

WHOLE LOTTA FOOTBALL

CHILLI PEPPER asked me ,"Do you love me more than football"? I asked in return, " College or NFL'? It was not the correct response.

1. According to the EYE test Alabama is the best team in the nation. The Tide sure looks the best. I think Bama would beat anyone if the championship game was this weekend. Nice Guy Nicky has the Tide Rolling.

2. The Gators look shaky right now. Superman appears used up. I don't think the Gators could beat Bama today .Urb the Turd needs to try that Wildcat thing. Florida has the right personnel , Demps & Rainey at the fly backs & Tebow taking the snap.

3. I don't care what fertlizer salesman Mack Brown says. Texas is not one of the top five teams in the nation. Mack needs to go to the Rodeo to throw that Bull.

4. Look to the West young man ! The USC Trojans are on the march .The boys from the coast are getting better weekly as their Freshman QB gains experience. Has anyone seen Mitch Mustain ?

5. Memphis Mayhem continues. I hear Lee Majors will coach the Tigers next year . The Six Million Dollar Man should be twice as good as Three Million Tommy. A Dude who hung out with Linda Evans & Farrah shouldn't find football a big step. Think about that R.C. & Plastic Priscilla.

6. Here is to the Titans for keeping it close. 59 - 0 !! There is no mercy in the NFL. In fairness to Beli - cheat the Titans did quit. Last years 13 - 3 dream is this years horrible nightmare. Will Jeff & the boys mail it in for the rest of the season?

MEDINA SAYING OF THE WEEK
When the MESS gets out of the Bull it is hard to get it back in!!

JABS, HOOKS, & CROSSES

1. I told you a couple of weeks ago A.C. Wharton would be the new Mayor. The outcome was decided when the power boys told Willie to drop out. Things will not get any better. A.C. is controlled by the same guys who pulled Willie's strings. The same people are still in power ,just a different front man. No Hope & Change for Memphis until the power boys are replaced.

2. Why doesn't Memphis dominate the conference they are in? I have no answer for this Question. I understand why Memphis can not compete with the SEC & the other power conferences. Before Memphis can move to a BCS conference they must dominate the C-USA. The Big Boys are not going to take a poor team from a very weak conference. If you bloom where you are planted maybe someone will transplant you to a better garden.

3. Why does a person run for office when they must know they have no chance to win ? Willingham,Lawler,Halbert, Whalum,& others had to know they had no chance to win. Is it an ego thing ? Chumney ,on the other hand, had no clue she was not going to win. Carol needs to visit the real world. Carol,you are not going to be Mayor of Memphis in this life. MOVE ON !

4. SAVIOR NEEDED ! That is what the job descripton should read. For some positions the expectations are so great it is not possible to measure up. President,Mayor,Superintendant,Pastor, & Coach are some of those where it is almost impossible to meet the demands.
LIKE BILLY HICKS & THE HOT LICKS used to sing
"When You try to make chicken salad out of chicken doo
it will only make you sad & blue.
That little ditty was top of the charts in Medina.

WHY I DON'T GO TO GAMES

I DON'T GO TO GAMES ANYMORE ,NOT EVEN IF YOU GIVE ME A TICKET. HERE IS WHY;

1. The drive to & from the stadium . This can take from 1 to 12 hours depending on where the game is. This is time I could be reading, doing Sudoku, or napping with Bud.

2. Parking & walking to & from the stadium. I have walked 2 miles from car to stadium. Some of the places you park, the walk back is the most exciting part of the night. Sometimes seeing your car still there is like winning the lottery.

3. Karma of Density - I have too much butt for my seat & tend to spill over a bit. Karma says I sit next to the biggest person at the stadium. So here is me & Jumbo trying to fit three 1/2 behinds in seats made for two narrow butts. We have a critical case of MBO. Major Butt Overload.

4. Jumbo has to go to the concession stand/restroom twice a quarter. This means I'm catching about 8 STINKY FACES a game.

5. There are long lines & high prices at the concession stand & restrooms. Waiting in line to pee at my age is dangerous.

6. People keep jumping up & down. To see I must jump up & down. When old Dudes jump up & down they must go pee, which brings us back to #5

7. You are hot, cold or wet or a combination there of.

WHY I WATCH AT HOME

1. No drive time , just turn on & off when the game begins or ends.

2.No parking or walking

3. I sit in my Lane Rebel recliner all by myself. No Jumbo.

4. I have never gotten a STINKY FACE in my den.

5. No lines at the restroom or the fridge. Low prices too.

6. No jumping up & down . No one between me & 52" wide screen. No dangerous waits at restroom.

7. Weather is always perfect.

LAST SATURDAY I WATCHED GAMES FROM 11 TO 11. WATCHED ABOUT 8 OF THEM . NO MUSS NO FUSS .KEEP THOSE TICKETS.

FOOTBALL ROUND - UP

1. What in the world got into Jonathan Crompton ? I think the Vols were playing a ringer named Peyton. Up to this point Crompton had been one of the worst QBs ever to play in the SEC. It must have been a dream. Crompton hallucinated being a real QB the entire game. The Vols will roll as long as the hallucination lasts.

2. If you want your QB to be outstanding :play Georgia. The Bulldogs have made every QB they faced look like Joe Montana. Could be the answer to the Tiger's problem . Forget C-USA get Georgia schedule.

3. The "Trust in Gus" banners changed to "Gus is a bust" as the Hogs rolled it up on the Return of Malzohn. Auburn crash - landed back in the real world while the Hogs kicked butt. "Get us Gus" became "Off the Gus Bus"

4. Mississippi State can't win for losing. The Dawgs fix their awful offense, then the Defense comes apart. In the last three games which should have been wins the Dawgs have failed to stop a Spread team,an Option team ,& a team with no offense. State has to learn to play on both sides of the ball.

5. I tried to warn you about Buster Nutt. He does not deliver when exspected. Ole Miss fans can stop singing High Hopes & come back to earth now. What kind of trophy for Jevon ?

6. Superman did not look the same, did he . I cringed every shot Tebow took. I am concerned Urb the Turd has wore Superman plumb out.

7. Think they are happy in Valdosta today ? The Nation's winningest high school football team just got their drawers dusted for the fifth straight year by crosstown rival Lowdens County. 57 to 13 was the latest beat down . Wildcat fans can't believe this is happening. Where are Wright Bazemore & Nick Hyder when you need them ? I bet coach Rick Tomberlin gets a new adress.

THE GREATEST TEAM THAT NEVER WAS - THE 1966 HORNETS

Here is a look back at the greatest team of their mind,er, time. The Hornets running their futuristic STING N SHOOT offense. Here are those who made it possible.
Coach - Harris " Whiskey Man " Palmer
drank a half pint of whiskey each day before practice ,great under pressure , sometimes had to wake him up to make game decisions, player's coach, called off practice when fish were biting.
QB - Billy Clyde Oakley
great leader , respected by team , made out with every cheerleader , highly dedicated ,cut back to two packs a day during season.
FB - Rocky Joe
triple threat player, threatened to quit three times, strange dude ,sat around reading Fun with Factorials & SUN TZU.
SBs - Ricky Ron & Dicky Don
twins,great speed, could run & catch ,were bad to steal ,had to take shower with money in hand.
WR - Dingle Queen
smartest guy on team ,scored academic double double, scored double digits on ACT & IQ test, great Dad , still friendly with both Moms.
WR - Jesse Tuggle
great possession receiver, in fact arrested three times for possession junior year.
C - Al "Dumper " Carter
great blocker , had trouble with snap count ,surprising since it never changed in the eight years he played
LG - Merle Hurley
comeback player after bad hunting accident, peed on electric fence while bird hunting, often had far away look in eyes.
LT - Charles " Big Junior" Cash
MVP, his Dad paid for uniforms, if Whiskey Man didn't do what Senior said we would have to play naked,great looking sister.
RG - Shannon O'Bannion
RT - Vannon O'Bannion
yeah buddy , more twins & 716 pounds of 'em ,both over 5'9'',members of century club ,they ate over 100 Krystals each in 20 minutes. bad to pass gas in huddle & at the line. confused Dumper who thought it was the snap count.
The Hornets played every Sunday at Barnfall Feild except when it was too hot or rained a lot . Most games were at Barnfall because probation officers would not let some of the boys leave the county.
Some of the games ended at half due to the Mercy Rule. After half with the cheerleaders no one feldt like playing anymore. A couple of games were called due to smoke.
Yes ,the Hornets were a ledgend in their own mind.
Thanks to Dan Jenkins for some of this memory of the Medina Mystic.

THOUGHTS I'VE BEEN THINKING

1. I think Israel will hit Iran a heavy lick . Israel can not permit Iran to get the big bomb. Israel knows they must strike or perish.

2. I think we are in big trouble. Obama is a narcissist. Clinton & Herendon are also. I guess narcissist disorders are common in the political world. They are dangerous Dudes.

3. I think the auto bail-out was a bad ideal. The auto makers will fail again because they have not changed any of the factors that lead to the first failure. The Auto industry needs to reform with changes in product models & Union contracts to be successful again.

4. I think Bobby Bowden should retire . He has had a wonderful run at FSU. It is sad to have a bad end to a great story. GO before the posse gets you Bobby. Joe Paterno should go also. Both Bowden & Paterno are destroying their legacy to chase a record.

5. I think the government should get out of the school business. No more public schools. Use Vouchers & Free Markets to educate. Then parents can decide the best school for their child. The Free Market is unforgiving. A bad school will not last long.

6. I think to know you have enough is to be truely rich.

7. I think the joy is in the journey not the destination.

RANDOM SHOTS

1.The Refs decided the LSU -Georgia game. I did not think any of the celebration calls were necessary. Next thing the Refs will start calling celebration penalties on the crowd. Everyone must stay in their seat and only clap when the Jumbo-tron says Appause.
2. Florida is the best team in the SEC - East. The other 5 are in a jumble. Georgia & Carolina are next , then Kentucky. Tennessee & Vandy will have to play a week before anyone scores.
3. Bama is the Best -N- West,followed by Auburn , Ole Miss,LSU,Arkansas,& State. The West is pretty tough.
4. Insane Lane ,your QB is the worst to ever start in the SEC. I feel bad for him but as Elvis used to say "We can't go on like this". Lane-o you need to go "WILDCAT" full time . Get you 3 runs & 2 passes & Let Her Rip Tater Chip. It worked for South Panola.
5. Dandy Dan down at State must have an up-grade at QB . Your QB is not good enough to win in the SEC. The DAWGS go down with much more excitement than they did with Croom.
6. The Memphis Tigers should be 4-1 not 1-4. TW said this was his most talented team. What is wrong ? RC & the Tiger Brass better do something fast . If the Tigers lose their small fan base there may be no getting it back.
7. Olive Branch; your offensive line is hugh . Has anyone suggested Power football to you ? If you get tired of getting your tail kicked try some real big boy football. If you are going to get all those players you should win with them.
8. RC's new market plan "If you want to watch football real bad, we have some real bad football."

WHY THE TIGERS CAN'T WIN

The Memphis football program is on life support. The Tigers could be down for the count . This could be the end of football at the University.
What is wrong? Why can't the Tigers win ? One reason & one reason only. The Tigers do not have the Players . That is all there is to it, Simple as that. Players win games ! You don't out-coach people you out-recruit them.
Bear Bryant won a few games .He said recruiting was 99% of the game. Why can't the Tigers recruit great players ?
Research in recruiting indicates four major factors determine a player's decision:
1. Recent Success of the Program - It is what have you done lately. Anything before 2000 is meaningless to these kids. Nebraska's past does not mean much to would -be Huskers today.
2. BCS Conference membership - Kids want to play for the National Championship & go to Mega - Bowls. Unless you are in a BCS conference you have little chance of this.
3. TV Exposure - Players want to play on TV. Coast to Coast Major network CBS, NBC, ABC, FOX, & ESPN. Not the Millington - Munford cable channel.
4. Stadium & Facilities - Players are not signing up to play at Halle Stadium. Players spend most of their time at the football complex . They are not interested in changing in the PE lockeroom.
Now ,we know why Players chose the schools they do let's see how Memphis stacks up:
1. The Tigers have won less than half of their games in Tommy's time. Won no conference championships & no Big - Time Bowls.
2. Tigers are in C-USA ,one of the weakest in America. The conference winner goes to the Liberty Bowl to play # 6,7, or 8 from the SEC. C-USA has never won this game.
3. Come to Memphis , play on national TV 3 times in your career. The Tommy West show is seen from Forrest City, to Coldwater, to Somerville. How's that for exposure!
4. Go to any SEC school & compare to Memphis. Where would you choose ?

Now you know why the Tigers can not win . Change the Coach will not help unless you change the players. The Tigers have had 6 coaches in the last 30 years & it has made little difference. IT IS WHAT IT IS.
I do believe the next coach can fail just as well at 250K as TW did at 1M.
Untill Memphis changes the factors in recruiting players the on -field performance won't change.

King Berrong used to say " At Sweetwater it is not how we line up but who we line up"
BIG ROCK says "The faster the players the smarter the Coach"

MYSTIC MUSINGS
OH YES I'm the Great Pretender the Platters sang. Were they singing of us ? How real are we ? Most days we play more roles than a Hollywood actor. We don't know what is real & what is make-believe.
The lies we tell & the games we play have made us strangers to ourselves. I'm almost 60 but still these questions churn inside.
How many beliefs do we have that we can follow from our outside to our inner core ? Most end in a tangle.
I do not know if the Platters sang of us but Kris Kristofferson sure did of me.
"He's a walking contradiction
partly truth partly fiction
taking every wrong direction
on his lonely journey home"
As the Homeboys say " KEEP IT REAL"

TURN OUT THE LIGHTS THE PARTY'S OVER
I am not going to make fun of Tommy West anymore. The Tiger situation is too dismal to joke about. TW is a below average coach who is in way over his head. That is saying a lot considering his massive ego.
I don't think Memphis can fire West. Does TW have a 3 million dollar buy-out ? How can Cal leave for 200k but it cost 3M to give TW the boot? Good Job Jimmy Sexton - Bad Mistake RC. The Tigers will stumble on hoping to win enough to be in the STINK POT Bowl again.
I am not sure there is an answer for the Tigers. Here are just three of the real facts the Tigers face;
1. no control over the home recruiting base
2. can not win the poor conference they are in
3. way behind in the facility arms race
Tiger fans can get the new Tommy West candy bar . You un-wrap it & it tells you how good it is.

The Party's over for the Titans. Last year everything went right in a 13-3 year , this year everything wrong in an 0-3 start. The Titans need to solve questions at QB . No up-side with Collins & VY looking like a bust.

There is something wrong in the Bulldog DNA. 99 out of 100 teams would have scored First & Goal from the 2 vs LSU. Not the Dawgs. State must have really whizzed off a bunch of GYPSIES somewhere along the line.

Difference between OLE MISS & Brett Farve. Farve is still #4.

ALL RIGHT WILLIE HUGH NELSON FROM ABBOTT TEXAS
TURN OUT THE LIGHTS THE PARTY'S OVER

SOME HARD PUNCHES
1.Urban Meyer is a jerk & a bully. If you whiz him off he sends his Gator Boys to put a run-up the score beatdown on you. When Little Laney dodged the hit Urb the Turd showed how vindictive he is.
Florida will not be National Champs, Superman does not have enough help. Tebow will be beat-up & overworked by the close of the season.
2. I learned you can be as stupid as Gomer Pyle & still make two million dollars a year.
Cases in Point; Houston Nutt & Steve Spurrier.
I warned you about Buster Nutt. Never wins all the games he is supposed to. Can sling the Bull with the best of 'em . Gets up-set wins to keep you hangin on.
No NC for the Rebs, no Heisman for Jevan, & probaly no Atlanta. A dream season done gone.
Steve Spurrier was my hero & role model . He needs to announce this morning that he is going to the golf course full time. Let Ellis take the Fightin Chickens the rest of the way.
I remember when teams won because of Spurrier, now they win in spite of him. Spurrier could not have done anymore to lose that game last night. Last 4 or 5 possessions 3 & out with almost no time off the clock & why not go for two with a 12 point lead. That decision almost bit him at the end.
Steve, What is the matter with you ? Has the Old Ball Coach lost it ? Sure looks like it.
3. Woo Wee ,that Hero Tommy is sure smart ! Hero Tommy has been playing possom . He used the non-conference games to set up the leauge games.
Old Tommy will rip through that C-USA schedule like diarrea through a nursey school. It will not be pretty.
Then Hero Tommy will lead the Tigers to the Liberty Bowl to face one of the worst SEC teams. C-USA has never won this game.
Then Hero Tommy will say "we are the only school in the nation to go to 3 Final -8s, six bowls in seven years, & forfeit all our games.'
R.C. says " It don't make no difference long as we don't have to pay no money back". And Priscilla's smile didn't shatter her face.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN TROUBLE WHEN;
1.THE COACH- When the attendance numbers fall it is over for the old Coach. I knew the frost was on the Great Pumpkin when I saw the vacant seats at Neyland Stadium . Sure enough in a couple of weeks the Great Orange Fat One was gone. Will this hold true for Hero Tommy ? Tiger attendance may be too poor to tell . Like they say at Medina " If they don't want to come you can't stop 'em".
2. THE PRESIDENT - Obama's numbers are falling fast. Barry has over-promised & under-delivered . Is it bad yet ? The best barometer is Hillary " LYING EYES" Clinton. As long as she thinks Obama can make it Lying Eyes will stand firm. The minute she doesn't think so ,she will resign her position & start her Primary run.
3. THE CITY - Memphis will know it is over when the taxpayers move away. When the folks who pay the tab give up & go elsewhere the freeloaders are finished. The crooks will leave also cause there is nothing left to steal. Is Sick Willie going to run for Mayor of Olive Branch ?
I told you Tony would go after Ziva. Any one who has studied the philosophy of Percy Sledge knows this.
You sure better know if Chilli Pepper was a hostage BIG ROCK would be on the way with a Jumbo can of WHUP !!!!!!

TALKING FOOTBALL
1. Tim Tebow - Is he the best ever in college football ? Who knows ? No one can answer that question . Tebow will have one of the most successful careers . Two national championships , one Heisman & counting. How good will Florida be when Superman is gone ?
2. Go Vols - Insane Lane & staff had a wonderful game plan for the Gators. If Lane will play it that way vs the rest of the schedule,the Vols will stay close in every game. The Big Orange will have a chance to win at the end. If Lane goes back to wide- open it will get Ugly.
3. JETS, JETS,JETS - The Jets are 2-0 with a rookie QB. People said Rex Ryan 's mouth was writing checks his Butt could not cash. They haven't checked out the size of Rex's Butt. Looks like a lotta cash to me.
Bellichick has not been the same since he picked up his new girlfriend.Or maybe that he has to stop cheating that is the difference.
4. Faces of Dallas - The Cowboys can sure make some faces. Wade Phillips looks like a guy waiting in the proctologist office.He knows it is coming just not sure when.
Tony Romo has the same smirk as a 12 year old who farted in church. I guess if you made millions, hang out with Jessica, you would'nt think a football game was a big thing either.
Jerry Jones looks like my Uncle Bud in the final days of acute constipation. I bet Wade does not make the year.
5. Tigers of Memphis - Have I missed it ? Has Hero Tommy told us how his brilliance saved the Tigers & blew out powerhouse UTM. Now Hero Tommy must win 5 of 9 vs a schedule Humes Jr High would be odds -on favorities aganist. Once again our Hero leads us to another Tolilet Bowl .
6. Most Important - Tomorrow night Tony will go save Ziva . SO would I !!!

JUST THINKING
Malcom X. used to say " It is not race that matters but dollars." Malcom X. meant there was more segregation by economics than segregation by race. Think about it. Examine the impact your economic status has on your life. Take a look at these areas:
1. Your Friends -- There are not many friendships across economic levels. Not many Doctors, Lawyers, & Corporate Dudes hang out with factory workers, truck drivers, & farmers. Close friendships must have shared experiences . Lack of wherewith all prevents this.
2. Your Spouse -- It is risky to marry outside of your economic class. You can not communicate with someone outside of their experience. It is hard to understand that which you have not experienced. Communication & understanding are kind of important in marriage.Even more it is almost impossible to blend families of different status levels. The financial tensions are tough to overcome.
3. Your Worship-- Most people seem to feel comfortable in a Church with people of a comparable income level. It is sad to say that Churches are known by the status of their members. Why is it that only the socially prominent seem to be Church leaders ? Does worldly success carry over to the Church ? Also the songs you sing , preaching style, & the clothes you wear are influenced by economic status.
There is so much more of life impacted by income ; such as you won't see many welfare checks cashed at the Peabody lobby or Wal-mart shoppers stopping at Oak Hall.
How about the big game . Super segregation there . Where you sit is determined by how much you paid .
IS IT ANY WONDER JESUS HAD SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT MONEY !!

SOME THINGS TO PONDER;
The Medina Mystic needs answers to these questions.
1. Why do so many Memphis/Shelby County football players decide to play their last year or two at Olive Branch ? Is it true that time slows at the Mississippi state line ? Can that last season become two ?
2. Who is the wonderful family counselor at Germantown ? The Mystic has noticed that baseball players facing divorce in the family can transfer to G-town . By the end of the season Mom & Dad are back together & everyone moves back home happy.
3. Memphis area elite academic schools have seen the need to help at - risk students . The schools are stepping up by admitting at-risk students who do not qualify academically ,financially , or socially . All these at- risk students are big ,strong, & fast. My question is; Are there any at- risk students that are small, weak ,& slow ?
4. Will Big Dollar Fred buy an NFL team for Cannon to QB when he finishes at Memphis ?
5. Will BCS Tommy become the national spokeperson for Barak Obama Motors at the end of the season ?
Give me CASH to watch a Clunker
Tiger fans get down & HUNKER
Our team's in the DUMPER
Our coach is a JUNKER!!!!

JABS, HOOKS, & A CROSS
1. Woo ,I hope Serena Williams does not yell at the Mannings the way she did the line judge at the Open. Alinsky says you can not communicate with someone outside of their experience. I doubt Archie spoke to the boys in those words & tones. If Serena cuts loose on Peyton & Eli I hope Miss Olivia packed some extra undies for the boys. Of course Peyton could turn it into a clean-up commerical. I would take Serena even up vs either brother in a slug - out.
2. Would someone please give my man Insane Lane a VEER playbook ? Lane - o, you can not win with Crompton in your scheme. John is just not capable. Play Berry & G. Jones at QB, Hardesty, Brown, & Oku at running back . You are already zone blocking. You have nothing to lose cause you can't win with what you are doing. No DC in the SEC is prepared to stop the VEER. Can you say Bill Yeoman or D.C. Nobles?
3. Will Ohio State ever beat USC ? The game was at Columbus, the Trojans had a true Freshman at QB, & new coordinators. If not now when ?
4. The Memphis Tigers are fresh out of hope. .They got their britches dusted by MTSU. Tommy West must be flat wore out from slinging all that BS. Tommy is BCS all the way , not bowl championship series but BIG CROCK OF STUFF.
5. Tigers Help is on the way . I bet Big Dollar Fred will build Cannon an on -campus stadium to play in & pay BCS- Tommy 2 million a year.

A FEW SIMPLE RULES
Government finance is not hard. You just have to remember a few simple rules..
1. Governments receive all their revenue by means of tax. That is simple: if the G-men want to spend funds they must tax to get the money.
2. More spending means more taxes . Every dollar the government spends has to come from somewhere. That would be us : the Taxpayer.
3. You cannot spend more than you collect in taxes. Most governments refuse to believe this. Refusal to recognize reality leads to massive debt & large interest payments.
4. If you increase spending you must increase taxes
5. If you cut taxes you must cut spending.
6. It is impossible to spend more than you take in w/o leading to disaster. This applies to individuals as well as governments.
Why can't the folks in the capitols learn these rules ?
Politicians who say otherwise are not telling the truth. You cannot increase spending without increasing taxes.

THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A FREE LUNCH!!!!

MONEY ,MONEY ,OH HONEY
I attended MIT for 6 years so that means I know a lot about money . Just to clear up any confusion the MIT I am speaking of is the Medina Industrial Trade school. I studied high finance & advanced cyphering there.
The first rule of investing is you must understand your investment. That eliminates most investments for most of us. A law of coaching I followed was the KISS principle. That means Keep It Simple Stupid!!
If an investment is complex that is a cover to take your money .Those banks & lenders knew from the start that those buyers would not be able to pay. What did they care . The mortage companies had already sold those loans to other banks.
The Interest Only Loan & the Wrap Around Down Payment were tricks to get folks hooked into loans they had no chance to pay.
If the deal has fancy math that is a flashing danger sign. The more creative the math the more you stand to lose.
How would you like to build & develop apartment housing , & not pay any tax ? Don't think you can ! All you need is a P.I.L.O.T grant . Your taxes are waived & some other taxpayer pays the tab.
Check & see who are getting P.I.L.O.T grants from Shelby County. You might be surprised !

SAME OLD TIGERS
Some thoughts about the first week ;
1. The Rebels did not look like a top 5 team . I do not think the Rebs will be in the SEC championship game.
2. If Insane Lane stays simple the Vols could win7. If the crazy man goes spread the Orange is dead. Lane always has that little smirk but you would too if your wife looked like Layla & you made 2 millon a year.
3. True Blue Tigers do not stand close to the curb. Ole Tommy is going to throw some body under the bus. If it is not his DC it is an o-lineman who quit on the play . Coach You are lucky all 11 didn't quit before the snap because it was a super stupid play call. Then to say we didn't run a QB sneak cause We don't do that. I guess you don't do first downs either.
4. If you are a Spread offense you will be as good as your QB. The Spread is a QB intensive offense. The Tigers do not have an excellent QB. Maybe a scheme that is not so dependant on the QB would help.
5. Memphis will do much better playing C-USA teams . About half the conference does not have defensive players that can walk and fart at the same time.

QUICK HITTERS
1. What in the world is going on in the NFL ? 3 OCs fired before the first game . A very quick trigger in K.C. ,Tampa Bay, & Buffalo. Having to win now is one thing but getting zapped before the first game . I didn't get fired that fast at Big Star when I spilled bleach in the lady's new car.
2. Relax Memphis Relax, The king makers & puppet masters have decided . Your new Mayor will be AC Wharton. No need for the cost of an election , the deal is done . It will be business as usual & AC is not a loose cannon like Sick Willie.
3. Is there a new rule in college football ?
Talk Trash
Get Knocked on your A*$!!!
That seems to be the way the Fighting Ducks of Oregon understand it. The Ducks are playing by the old Medina Rule :
If you talk it up
You sure better back it up.
I bet old 94 from Boise knows the rule from now on.

TALKING FOOTBALL
Here are the forecasts for 3 of the local college football teams.
1. Mississippi - The Rebels should have a big year. They are one of two SEC teams who have a proven QB. Florida is the other.
The Rebs have a favorable schedule with the toughies at home. The QB and the schedule should result in an excellent season in Oxford. Best case scenario 12 - 0. I don't think it will happen. 10 - 2 sounds right to me.
Danger games : Memphis in the opener, Arkansas at home & Vandy on the road.
Remember Nutt seems to come up big when exspectations are low & come up short when they are high.
2. Memphis - If the Tigers could win at the same ratio Tommy West is paid they would be a Top Ten team. West is the most overpaid coach in football.
The Tigers should win 4 maybe 5 at home but could struggle on the road. About 3 road wins is the most hoped for.
Best case secnario 9 - 3 Most likely 6 - 6
The Tigers will not make the Liberty Bowl but once again will be in a stinky toilet bowl.
3. Tennessee - Insane Lane roars into his first year on Rocky Top .Kiffin is lacking the most important part , a QB. Maybe a more simple scheme of offense will help; as will 8 games in Neyland Stadium.
The Vols could go 0-for the road. One road win is the most hoped for & a bunch at home. Best case secnario for the Big Orange is 9 - 3. The most likely finish is 6 - 6 .
Whatever the record Insane Lane , Coach O , & Daddy Kif should be a trip!! Don't be shocked to see Tennessee in the Liberty Bowl.

MEDINA DAYS
I grew up in Medina Tennessee . I lived out in the country three miles north of town. I lived there all my childhood except the three years [59 - 61 ] that I lived in Chicago . I stayed home till I married then hit the road in 1972.
I left Medina looking for answers I never found . Didn't find 'em cause the answers were already in Medina.
Medina back then was a great place to grow up. You had to work to get in trouble . Some folks say I really worked hard . All those things we did seemed like a good ideal at the time .
Towns and schools today are large & impersonal : not so at Medina . I can make a phone call or e-mail & find out what all 25 of my group are doing . About half the bunch still live close to home . Most all are within 500 miles.
Life's journey has been typical for our bunch . only 2 have passed on but time is running out of the rest of us . We are pushing 60. MERCY DADDY !
We have had our share of heartbreak, sickness, divorces, & other calamities. I don't know of anyone who changed the world or made a big impact . We just lived our lives ,loved ,laughed,cried,& hurt along the journey .
Those answers the MEDINA MYSTIC spoke of : they are found in the journey - to love somebody - invest in your children - make things better for others.
What is it going to matter
material possessions or fame
when JESUS calls your name.
The old Mystic made the wrong choice sometimes in picking the things are are really important.

KICKS & KISSES
1. A kiss [ugh!!!! ] to Prince Mongo for a great debate showing. The sad thing is 90% of what Mongo says is correct. A good flush would help Memphis more than anything.Lot had more luck looking for a good man in Sodom than we have looking for an honest politician in Memphis.
2. A kick for Sharon Webb ! I was embarrassed for her. It must have been a lack of preparation , nobody can be that dumb ! She is a member of the Memphis City School board. Lord help us !
3. A kiss for CBHS. They let a mentally challenged old man hang out with them . The Brothers even pretend to listen. It makes an old dude feel good. Thanks Kevin ,Dave & the rest of the gang.
4. A big kick for the whole health care mess. I wish we could get some facts, not scare tatics.
Well, let,keep watching, catch you later

IS IT TIME TO BAIL ?
I have lived in Shelby County for 35 of the last 36 years. It seems more like home than Medina where i grew up. But is it time to pack up, stack up , & hit the road ?
I do not want any part of consolidation with Memphis ! I think Memphis is too far gone to be saved . Shelby County is on the verge of following Memphis over the edge. I can't handle another tax increase . I can't laugh anymore to keep from crying about the corrupt government.
Oh ! but what choice do I have ? I can not get anywhere near the appraised value of my house. My Doctors and hospitals are close. I love my church . What few friends I have are here. Even the strangers I thought were my friends are here .
I hate to just give up. I have too much invested to cut & run. But I don't want to go down with the ship either.

It may take the MEDINA MYSTIC a while to figure this one out!!

SOME HIGH HARD ONES
Diversity is good, that is a lie. No super power has ever had diversity in values or purpose . That is why the USSR collapsed. The diverse groups would not trust each other.It is okay to be diverse in what music you like,the books you read & what you want to eat . That's all- right. A nation better be unified in their core beliefs not diverse . The Bible tells us that we are to be one in JESUS. It is possible to be diverse in little matters but not the Biggies.
Our government is on the take. It's all about the money. The boys in Washington do what puts money in their pocket not what is good for the country. Who did the bailout help ? Not the small investor ! All that money went in the pockets of executives who get millions in bonus .Term limits are the only hope to clean out the mess. Is it time for another revolution?
Sick Willie is not going to run for mayor, that was just a diversion tactic to give Sick Willie time to ensure that half - million pension payout. Now no matter what happens the GREAT ONE has the cash. You know Sick Willie has a PHD . PARANOID HYSTERICAL DISORDER !!!!

TIGER TEARS
It is a sad day in Memphis. The Tigers sins have found them out. The Calipari crop has come to harvest. All of the fears about Cal have come to be.
If Tiger fans would be honest, they knew what they were getting with Cal. A bend all the rules program, hired guns for players,and a lot of talk .
What you get with Cal is a lot of wins, national rankings & Final Four trips then the posse gets to town & the Little Lizzard disappears in a puff of smoke. The University is left holding the bag.
R.C. & Shirley - Was it worth it ?

OFFENSIVE THINKING
There are 45 football teams in West Tennesee not counting Memphis and Shelby county.
15 of those teams run the Spread offense, 10 run the Wing - T / Double Wing , & 9 teams run the I formation. So you will see a variety of styles of offense.

RANDOM SHOTS
1. Little MYRON IS not playing fair. What does he mean ; asking King Willie to take a drug test. King Willie can't pass a drug test. Willie can't pass anything other than gas !

2. Brett Favre is a good fit for the Vikings . Brett should be able to throw enough to prevent teams from ganging up on Peterson. Favre is worth a try. He could put the Vikings over the top.

3. Is there any hope for public schools ? Is the system too broken to fix ? Should the government get out of the school business ?Private schools have one advantage that makes them better than public schools . THE POWER TO EXCLUDE !!!!!